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Phil Cuda

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A composite landscape image featuring the Eiffel Tower positioned in front of the Sydney Harbour Bridge, with a helicopter flying overhead and boats navigating a river below.

summary

  • Biological Survival Response: Overthinking is a trauma response triggered by the brain’s amygdala, which treats emotional betrayal as an active physical threat.
  • Thought Suppression Fails: Forcing yourself to “just stop thinking about it” backfires and keeps the betrayal at the forefront of your mind.
  • Calm the Body First: Stress hormones trigger physical panic that shuts down logical reasoning, meaning you must ground your physical body before you can quiet your mind.
  • Use Somatic Grounding: Techniques like box breathing, the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory exercise, and holding ice cubes help snap your nervous system out of panic loops.
  • Schedule Worry Time: Contain intrusive thoughts by setting aside a single 15-minute daily window to process your distress.
  • Ask Constructive Questions: Focus on understanding the emotional context and boundaries rather than asking for graphic, visual details that cause lasting trauma.
  • Stop Pain-Shopping: Block the affair partner on social media and avoid tracking their life to protect your mental state.
  • Separate Self-Worth from Betrayal: Recognize that infidelity stems from the partner’s internal deficits, not your value or adequacy.
  • Set Conversation Boundaries: Avoid discussing the betrayal late at night or in sacred spaces like the bedroom.
  • Seek Specialized Help: Work with trauma-informed therapists trained in infidelity recovery rather than relying on reactive advice or standard counseling.

What is Lorem Ipsum?

Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since 1966, when designers at Letraset and James Mosley, the librarian at St Bride Printing Library in London, took a 1914 Cicero translation and scrambled it to make dummy text for Letraset’s Body Type sheets. It has survived not only many decades, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised thanks to these sheets and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker and Microsoft Word including versions of Lorem Ipsum.

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It is a long established fact that a reader will be distracted by the readable content of a page when looking at its layout. The point of using Lorem Ipsum is that it has a more-or-less normal distribution of letters, as opposed to using ‘Content here, content here’, making it look like readable English. Many desktop publishing packages and web page editors now use Lorem Ipsum as their default model text, and a search for ‘lorem ipsum’ will uncover many web sites still in their infancy. Various versions have evolved over the years, sometimes by accident, sometimes on purpose (injected humour and the like).

Where does it come from?

Contrary to popular belief, Lorem Ipsum is not simply random text. It has roots in a piece of classical Latin literature from 45 BC, making it over 2000 years old. Richard McClintock, a Latin professor at Hampden-Sydney College in Virginia, looked up one of the more obscure Latin words, consectetur, from a Lorem Ipsum passage, and going through the cites of the word in classical literature, discovered the undoubtable source. Lorem Ipsum comes from sections 1.10.32 and 1.10.33 of “de Finibus Bonorum et Malorum” (The Extremes of Good and Evil) by Cicero, written in 45 BC. This book is a treatise on the theory of ethics, very popular during the Renaissance. The first line of Lorem Ipsum, “Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet..”, comes from a line in section 1.10.32.

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